In a world where society tells us how we should wear our hair we shouldn’t have to listen to how friends and family want us to wear our hair. As far back as I can remember I always had to listen to my mom’s side say they hate long hair and how my dads side loved long hair. I always wanted long hair but never got the chance to have it long as a child cause of my family. Once I moved in with my ex the suppression continued. Once I came out at about 25 everything changed I started to find me. When I started to find me my ex started making my life horrible. I had longer hair down past the back of my bra and I decided I was going to do a massive side buzz and chop off all my hair. I dyed it just about every possible color and eventually did dreads. To be honest the most liberating thing I ever could have done is shave the side of my head. Not only did it break the social norm but it also was me breaking free.
When thing started getting bad with my ex. I took the opportunity to shave all my sides. Back then it was liberating but now as I sit back and look at why I did it it makes a lot of sense. My ex used to grab my hair and pull on it aggressively when we did sexual things. Now I love my hair pulled but this was the wrong way. He would grab at the back of my head when I would give him a BJ and when he grabbed my hair he would slam my face into him so hard I would end up with black and blue cheek bones and bridge on my nose. He would use my hair the move my head up and down on his own instead of holding it as I moved my head on my own. When he would do this he would ripe handfuls of hair out. So I started to shave the sides and back off, this eliminated how much hair he could grab ahold of and was harder for him to pull out.
As I left my abusive and controlling ex I continued to buzz my sides. Once I started seeing my boyfriend I finally got the motivation to grow my hair out. This May will be my two years of growing it out. At first I hated it. The lengths were different and it drove me crazy, but I continued to grow my hair I wanted change. I wanted to let the past go and move forward with a new look to go along with my new life. As the years went on I have seen a different me. I have a full head of hair and can actually do things with my hair now. The shaved sides are still a different length but It isn’t as noticeable because I can put it all up into a ponytail. My hair is the longest it has ever been. All my childhood I heard how horrible long hair was and could never grow it out. Now I have the freedom to do whatever I want with my hair. When I look in the mirror and comb my hair I feel like I love myself more. It is like that baby that you support and help it grow to be an adult or that plant that you got and it was so small, but after taking care of it it has became a big beautiful bush with tons of blooms on it. I am amazed at how much my hair has grown over the last few years. I cant wait to see how long I can grow it throughout the next years.
Time to keep moving forward and to continue growing in all ways hair and all!
Love,
💋Kitten🐈⬛
