Wow I haven’t wrote a blog in forever. I have been meaning to write this one for awhile, but life has gotten in the way. So there are many meanings to collars in the BDSM world, but I wanna really just talk about mine. This is something that I have wanted to tell Daddy but I could never figure out the best way to say it. I also never really said anything either cause I really don’t know what he thinks about it. But here we go……
Technically I am not collared. Daddy has never collared me. Almost a year ago Daddy gave me my nickname of Kitten. When Daddy gave me the nickname I decided that I wanted to get me a necklace with a Kitten on it. At first it was just something to represent my nickname, but over time it has became more to me. Early on I chose not to play with others. This started out cause I had some problems with others in the club we belong to, however, It became a commitment to Daddy. Here let me explain. When me and Daddy met he had a primary and I was just a sub. When I told him I didn’t wanna play with others I was very serious about that. As time went on I ended up becoming his primary. With our living situation this commitment meant a lot. I lived so far away and wasn’t easy for me to see him. It would have been easy for me to see other people with Daddy never finding out, however, I committed myself to Daddy. This is where I feel my necklace became a collar to me. It was something that I had from him all the time and gave me comfort when he wasn’t around. It made me feel like he was still there. I know corny. I have only taken it off 3 times in the 9 months of having it. Once was when we went swimming cause I was afraid that the chlorine would ruin it. Another time was when I changed the chain and the last time was when I broke the chain. The moment I realized it meant more to me than a regular necklace was when I broke the chain. I was really upset that it broke like I was in tears cause I couldn’t wear it until I got a new chain. Daddy took me to the store to get a new chain for it cause he knew how much it meant to me.
So to me my necklace is like a collar. It holds a lot of meaning to me and I will never take it off. It shows commitment to Daddy, Reminds me of how special I am that I got a nickname from Daddy, It reminds me of my love for Daddy and that he loves me also. It reminds me that even when we are not together physically we are still together. I love when we are out and he fixes it for me. It shows that he cares for me in ways no one ever has. So just like a collar my necklace holds a lot meaning and this is why I feel like I self collared myself. My necklace also helps me remember that I am not alone. Daddy is always there to help and support me. If I fall Daddy is there to make me feel better, if I am sad Daddy is there to make me feel better, if I am happy and excited Daddy is the first one to be there and most importantly if come out of my comfort zone or do something on my own he is always so proud of me. This is why I feel like to everyone else it is just a necklace that I always wear but to me it is and will always me much more just like a collar.
